I live in a HypnoBirthing bubble. I eat, sleep and breathe natural birth. Something that initially shocked me but now I’m getting used to is that HypnoBirthing isn’t everyone’s cup of tea.
Yes, I get it, it has a weird name but even when I have the chance to explain about what it is, there are some women, who just say no. And this is why….
I Don’t Believe In It
There are always going to be skeptics. These women hear the word ‘hypno’ and that’s enough to turn them off.
That’s it, they’re done, not anything I can say will convince them otherwise.
That’s ok with me – this program is not for them.
It’s Too Expensive
Prams and cots and car seats, oh my!
Having a baby is expensive. There are all the things and the stuff that you need and want. HypnoBirthing classes for many seem like an extra.
It’s not an essential for the baby so therefore, it can be cut from the ever growing list of things to buy.
I can quote stats at you (which I often do) about birth trauma and post natal depression but in the long run, these women will either decide that their birth experience is something to be cherished, or it’s not.
Does it break my heart that many of the women who say its too expensive will have a shitty time during and after their birth? Yes.
Can I take them by the shoulders and shake them and make them listen? No, that would be weird and aggressive.
All I can do it hope that my message plants a little seed in their head.
Maybe they will read a little further, investigate a little more, watch a beautiful birth video, read some birth stories.
And just maybe, some of these women will realise that the cost of NOT doing HypnoBirthing is greater than they could ever imagine and book in to this program that will change their life.
I Don’t Need It
Ah yes, a very common response I hear. It goes hand in hand with ‘I trust my care provider to look after me’ and ‘I’m going with the flow, whatever happens, happens’.
Before I experienced HypnoBirthing for myself I probably wouldn’t have given this response a second thought. I would have thought – good on them! They sound confident and cruisy, they’ll be fine!
Now, years into my journey of motherhood and teaching this program, I know the ugly truth.
The truth is our hospital system is in crisis. It sounds melodramatic I know!
Even when I started teaching a year ago I thought it surely couldn’t be that bad. I wish I was wrong.
Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t believe that there are evil OB’s and midwives out there, hanging out to mistreat women but we have serious issues with routine base care.
Routine based care in often NOT evidence based and is there to cover the hospitals butt if things go wrong.
I’ve also had the displeasure to learn about something called ‘Bait and Switch’.
This is when a hospital or doctor talks the natural birth talk but their actions, normally during labour are the exact opposite.
Think along the lines of ‘I support natural birth, you can birth however you want, as long as its safe.’
Sounds good right?
Then talk of induction starts, or maybe you’re hooked up for continuous monitoring or an IV during labour. Suddenly you’re birthing on your back, needing forceps and an episiotomy.
It happens in the blink of an eye and ends in a baby and a side helping of trauma.
Call me dramatic, over the top or crazy – I don’t mind. I know the truth about our maternity system because of said eat, sleep, breathe obsession with birth.
I have heard the stories from sad, shocked mama’s full of pressure, disrespect, coercion and bullying. It happens in our private system and public.
You need a strong mind and brave heart to navigate this birthy world. I can help you with that.
My Friend Tried It And It Didn’t Work
This can be a real issue for some women. Why would you go and spend over $500 on something your trusted friend has said is a piece of crap? You’d have to be mad.
I have personal experience with this. I did the course in 2012 and still had a traumatic birth. But the difference is that I didn’t point the finger and blame, I took ownership of the experience.
What did I do right? What would I have changed if I could? Why did I have that birth, what was my lesson to be learned?
I took all of that and in 2015 had a phenomenal birth.
I then took all those learning’s and apply them to my teaching. All my mistakes and successes I share.
And guess what? The mums who are ready for that message, get it and go on to have amazing births themselves.
Do all the mum’s I teach have an incredible experience?
In all honesty, no. We birth as we live. Some of us take longer to trust ourselves, to listen to our instincts and believe in our bodies. And that’s ok.